Pilaks are Talented

10 Feb

This is for all the Sabahan out there.

To the non Sabahan, pilak means ILLEGAL smelly immigrants (particularly from philipines) – currently flooding the whole Sabah, my hometown.

I can’t even fathom the amount of disgust I feel for them sometimes.

But I gotta say, these people are the most talented people I’ve ever known in the entire universe, given their situation and education level.

1. Who else can make a whole freaking slum from a simple wood :

From this:

To this:

Architectural level : Pilak

2.  They breed faster than rabbits.

One Pilak female + One Pilak Male = 98765434432765467389 AND MORE TO COME.

While normal human being can just give birth once a year at most, these people can breed 5 times a year.  Not exaggerating.

Breeding level : Pilak

3. Their perfume is better than Chanel or any Christino Dior or however you spell that shit.

They have their own aroma and brew from the finest liquid that human being can never discover.

Trust me, when you smell one, you know its them and you can be rest assure that they are still 10 miles away, and you can start running from now to avoid getting raped / robbed by them.

Yeah. you can smell em from as far as 10 miles away.

It’s like a combination of smelly rotten rats and fish and shit altogether at once bombarding your nose.

It requires some kind of super power to be that smelly.

Perfume level: Pilak

4.  Some pilak own 140% original Identity Card and classified them as local Malaysian.

They even can be a Bumiputra, own land and vote.

Meanwhile , in another state : 

http://poobalan.com/blog/borninmalaysia/2010/09/06/citizenship-woes-for-old-folks-and-the-stateless/

Poor guy still fails to apply citizenship in Malaysia although he was born in Malaysia.

Corruption level : Pilak

5. The roads in the whole Sabah are belong to them, or their parents. Highway, low way, all base belong to them.

They will cross the road like there’s nobody’s business, and they can never die from all the jaywalking they did.

Never.

Jaywalking level: Pilak.

6. Their embassy is located in Center Point Shopping mall.

The oldest shopping mall in KK. (me thinks?). Once you enter the mall,be terrified.

BE VERY TERRIFIED.

They are everywhere. Stairs, cinema, bowling alley, front alley, back alley, your back, and everywhere within eye sight.

They will pollute the whole area like a motherfucker they are.

They will sit in the middle of nowhere and stay there to watch girls or whatever fuck that they want. Whenever girls pass by, they will make a nasty , uncivilized comment.

Thick skin level: Pilak

Sometimes, I classified some local as pilak too, because of their behaviors and talent are so much alike to that of a pilak.

So, Pilak is not only a talent, it is a rare, acquired talent too.

You’re a Sabahan too?

Feel free to add more to this talent list of theirs.

All are welcome.

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